Teachers

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.  (Psalm32:8, NIV)

The school year is wrapping up.  For our family it is also the end of our years at my daughter’s school since she will begin High School in theFall.  Yesterday she came home with her yearbook, and although we have purchased the yearbook in years past, this year I was especially excited to see the “Seniors section”.  You know, the area they get to personalize with their favorite quotes, where they (think) will end up in 10 years, and other little personal tidbits.  What caught my eye was not that my daughter noted me as one of her influences but she specifically mentioned her 5^th grade teacher.  I could not agree more,
and was proud that she gave this teacher the recognition.  This teacher has gone above and beyond being a teacher, she has become my daughter’s confidant, and my personal friend .

After Nadia moved on to 6^th grade, we turned to this teacher for math tutoring.
One day per week for an hour she tutored my daughter in math, I would arrive for at pick-up and she and I would spend 10 minutes just talking.  Although our age difference is 12+ years, I never felt like she was older than me, we laughed, and commiserated about the
same things.  Our 10 minute chats started to get longer and longer so at some point we decided me meet for dinner.  It was at that dinner that I learned of her dedication to her students, not by anything specific that she said, but just in the joy in her voice, in her eyes when she talked about her students.  I knew that she volunteered to run plenty of outside of the classroom activities and I had always thought because she had empty-nest syndrome…her kids were away at College; her husband travelled, but I realized that she didn’t see teaching as something that ended when the kids left the classroom, she wasn’t just teaching Language Arts and Social Studies, she was teaching charity and Christian values. In 7^th grade, my daughter had some typical girlfriend drama, and I was beyond tired of the day to day complaints. While I tried to listen, I knew that my attitude displayed that I thought it was all trivial.  She came home one day, unexpectedly in a good mood.  I carefully asked her how things were during lunch that day with her friends and she told me that she had gone in to talk with Mrs. H that morning and got some good advice that she exercised during lunch and now all was well.  It was the first time that I found out that Mrs. H was her confidant, and I was relieved that she had someone whom I truly trusted that she could turn to.

Last week, as I was picking my daughter up from an after school activity, I saw Mrs. H outside, in the heat, running laps with some third grade girls.  “Girls
Who Run” is the name of the program, and she is the Chair this year.  I pulled the car up slowly as I approached her and asked her when she would ever tire of these kids.  “They need to know I am always interested in their whole being” was her response.
Wow.  This woman totally embodies Psalm 32: 8 “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you. “  She has kept that loving eye on my daughter for the past 4 years, and the kids who she encounters on a daily basis are blessed to have her in their lives, I know I am.

Marie

A crushed Spirit

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.  

(Proverbs 17: 22, NIV)

Have you ever had one of those days? Well lately I have been having a few of those days…make that a few of those months.  So much so that it has kept me from updating this blog.  I’ve had so much I wanted to write, but personal issues have dried up not just my bones but my mind.  I’ve been, basically on auto pilot.  Waking up, going to work, and being upbeat me on the outside…while inside turmoil and anxiety had taken hold.  It’s nothing tragic, just your everyday concerns; the economy, bills, aging parents, ailing friends and family members, and more bills.  I internalize things, and I worry.  When the worrying gets to be too big, I don’t sleep, but always I pray.  My late night prayers always lead me to one of the prayers recited in the Catholic Church after the Our Father “…Deliver us, Lord, from every evil, and grant us peace in our day. In your mercy keep us free from sin and protect us from all anxiety as we wait in joyful hope for the coming of our Savior, Jesus Christ.”   Protect us from all anxiety.  Synonyms for anxiety include unease, worry, concern and fretfulness.  Some nights I can check off all of the above.  But as I mouth the words “protect us from all anxiety” I do feel a lifting of sorts.  I feel better knowing that just by saying those words that God Our Father is on the receiving end of that prayer and is working on my anxieties. I know that he is because I always fall peacefully back asleep.

About 2 weeks ago, I was so lost in thought that I had no idea that my husband and daughter were cracking jokes about me.  My husband reached over and formed my straight lined lips into a smile, and asked me if I was feeling sick.  Proverbs 18:14 (NIV) says: ^“The human spirit can endure in sickness, but a crushed spirit who can bear?”  I wasn’t physically sick but my spirit had fallen ill due to worry.  I felt badly that I had allowed my mind to wander and in doing so missed that light moment amongst our family.  So I have made a concentrated effort to put the anxieties in God’s hands and restore my cheerful heart to where it once was.  What a load off my heart!  This past weekend we hosted family and then enjoyed my daughter’s dance recitals, next week is my daughter’s graduation, then pretty soon it is her birthday, and our wedding anniversary.  The issues that keep my mind wandering are still there, but so is my God, and he is protecting me from those anxieties so that I can get back to enjoying my many upcoming celebrations!

He is Risen

“Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” (John 11:23, NIV)

Exactly two weeks ago today, my best friend’s father finally passed on from this life to the life everlasting.  On August 17th, 2010,  after having had a routine surgery, something went terribly wrong and he succumbed into a coma.  For the past 7+ months, my girlfriend has sat daily at his bedside, first at the hospital, then at the nursing home where he lived until the end.  I visited him at the hospital, and the last time I was there, I looked into his face and felt very sad.  He was a very, very vibrant man; sharp dresser, man of few words but worthy actions.  He used to come to the city to pick my girlfriend and me up during our lunch breaks and take us for ice-cream. What a joy for us grown-up women, wives and mothers in our own right to still have someone who treated us like little girls. We enjoyed those outings, and as I visited his bedside, I rubbed his leg and reminded him that he needed to wake up because right before he went in for the surgery he had committed himself to an ice-cream date.  By mid February, I had a sinking feeling that “Pops” was not going to ever be the same again, and I watched as my best friend poured all of her love, her hopes and her care into bringing him back to himself.  I watched as she slowly came to some acceptance that he may wake up but would not be the same Pops we knew and loved, but more importantly I saw just how much she loved her Dad and I realized how painful it would be for her when the finality of it all hit.

At Pop’s viewing, I couldn’t help but notice how good he looked.  So much better than he looked connected to the machines and tubes that forced him alive at the hospital. As cliché as it sounded, he looked peaceful, almost happy.  Dapper as usually in his suit and matching shoes, and just that hint of a smile that always graced his face. He looked peaceful.  I stood above him and thought about the story of Lazarus.  When Jesus was brought to his friend’s tomb he was so sad that he wept, and told his sisters they must belive that he would rise again:  ^“Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; ²⁶ and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11: 25, NIV).  I thought that Pops, having been rid of the tubes and machines and being the child of God that he was, was now living again, not in the way that we would have wanted him to but he was certainly alive again with God.

I had this feeling 3 years ago when my uncle died. He had fought an arduous fight with cancer and the end was physically painful. Yet at his viewing, he looked serene, peaceful and yes..almost happy. I had talked to him the day he died and knew that he was ready to meet the Lord, he told me he was at peace and I felt it….I saw it. 

I have no doubt that both of these formidable men of God are alive and well in the Kingdom of God. I felt both their presence on Easter Sunday when I heard the words ” He is not here; he has risen! …” (Luke 24: 6, NIV) I knew that Pops was not where he was laid the day before, but that he had risen to be with Our Father and all was finally well with him and for him.

Marie

Tax Day

Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor (Romans 13:7, NIV).

April 15^th… this is traditionally tax day here in the states.  The day that every American pays their dues to the IRS…not always a happy day in some households.   This year the government gave us an extension and we have a few extra days to get them in…I’m not so sure that this was a good idea because procrastinators (like me and my husband) just waited until today to get them done.  You know the notion, the longer we can hold on to our money, the better.   We alternate each year between doing our own taxes and taking our paperwork to a real tax professional.  Regardless of which way we go, once the process is over, neither of is in a jolly mood. I will usually retreat to my corner with a book that can take my mind away from taxes and my husband is mind deep into some sci-fi movie, his goal being the same.  We both agree that it is a necessary evil.

My daughter plays one of those virtual reality games on her pc where she has a family and apparently owns a couple of houses (nice huh?) And she finds it real easy to pay her taxes. As a matter of fact, she tells me that when she ran into a problem paying the taxes on one of her virtual mansions the other week, she simply abandoned it and concentrated on expanding the remaining house.  Oh boy…this kid has a thing or two to learn about the Internal Revenue Service and more importantly about paying bills!

Taxes, as well as Tax collectors have never been painted in a favorable light throughout the ages, a quick look into the pages of the Bible will only confirm that they were vilified and no one but Jesus could tolerate them. So much so that he hand-picked one to follow him: [ The Calling of Matthew ] As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector’s booth. “Follow me,” he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him (Matthew 9:9, NIV) His association with Matthew brought even more scrutiny towards him, the Pharisees, who were looking for even more reasons to persecute Jesus watched with curiosity: “While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew’s house, many tax collectors and sinners came and ate with him and his disciples. ¹¹ When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” (Matthew 9:10-11, NIV) .  The bible also taught that taxes, as unpopular as they are, should be paid as they are part of the law and laws are made to be followed: “This is also why you pay taxes, for the authorities are God’s servants, who give their full time to governing.” (Romans 13:6).

So while I, like many others, dread the annual tax experience, I take some consolation in knowing that I am following the teachings of Jesus when I pay my taxes and follow the laws as they are (ultimately) governed by our Lord….now off to teach this kid that she just can’t NOT pay taxes or,  maybe I can move into that abandoned virtual mansion?

 Marie

Helpful Guidelines

“For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord (2 Peter 1: 5-8, NIV)

 I don’t know about the rest of you, but I am always browsing Parenting magazines to get helpful guidelines and hints about what works for other parents.  When my daughter was an infant it was mostly what “What to Expect the First Year”; everything from feedings, sleep patterns to diaper rash was a concern to me, and I used this handy little resource to “get it right”.  Later on I leaned on the advice of experienced moms who always were willing to offer their tidbits about potty training and social norms for toddlers.  I never lacked for experts, but while fulfilling all of the physical needs, in the back of my head, I knew that there were other areas of her life that I needed to guide.

I grew up in a spiritual house.  My grandmother was the matriarch, and she insisted on prayer and attendance at church. It was never much of a discourse in our house, it was a given; we believed in God, we worshiped and praised.  My mother was not a church goer.  Yet I never doubted her faith in God because I saw visible signs of her faith every day.  She worked the night shift at a Nursing Home, and each evening before she left the house, she got on her knees and prayed.  Each morning when she returned home from work, she prayed….and God was the resource she referred us to whenever there was any doubt about “how to” do anything.  Faith was the fortification and with that faith, I was encouraged to gain knowledge, and with that knowledge I was counseled to practice self-control.  Self-control led to perseverance in all of my endeavors knowing that the end result would please my family, me and most importantly, God.

While I still read parenting articles to get ideas of what other like-minded parents are doing, I still refer to reach back to 2 Peter 1:  5 – 8 for some more life instructions for me and my family.

 Marie

A Penny Earned

“Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have…”(Hebrews 13:5, NIV)

When I was a teenager, I couldn’t wait to get my first job so I could make my very own money and buy all the nice clothes that I wanted.  As soon as I was able to get official working papers, I went for it, smiling as visions of the latest jeans floated around in my mind.  My mother had other plans.  She didn’t allow me to get a paying job, no arguments accepted.  I was taken to the local hospital and signed up as a candy-striper in the pediatric unit. My mother was very clear that at the age of 16, she did not want me to “fall in love with money.”  Needless to say, I was ticked. I grew tired of hearing Ecclesiastes 5:10:
“Whoever loves money never has money enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income….” My cousins were allowed to work for money and some of my friends also…what was her problem?! Looking back, I honestly don’t know what my argument was, my mother kept me in the latest fashion and when I needed money for school outings and other things, it was provided.

Fast forward to today.  My daughter does not get an allowance.  When she was little we had a chore chart.  She had to perform certain daily chores for which she received a sticker on the calendar when they were completed.  At the end of the month each increment of stickers meant a certain reward (e.g: 10 stickers = a new book, 15 stickers = a small toy, 30 stickers = $5).  That lasted about 2 years before we realized that she aimed for whatever she wanted that month…book, toy, outing but never really the money.  At 7 and 8 years of age, the money wasn’t all that attractive to her, she wanted something more tangible.  Lately, she has been asking for an allowance and I find myself on the verge of agreeing with my mother, but the practical side of me says that 13 is a good age to start learning to be responsible for money and not being infatuated with money.  She receives money for her birthday, Christmas and randomly from Grandma (yup the same woman who wouldn’t let me get a job) with which we have made her open a bank account.  She dips into that money every once in a while when there is something she really, really wants and which I really, really will not purchase.  Here is my issue with an allowance…what is the allowance for?  Has it been earned? Can I start the chore chart again and expect her to be rewarded based on chores completed monthly?…should I be paying her for things she should be doing around the house anyway?! 

I don’t think she will be given an allowance any time soon.  Unlike my Mom, I won’t be as opposed to her getting a summer job when the time comes.  At that time, she will continue to learn about saving.  She’ll be reminded of Proverbs 6: 6-8, and encouraged to be more like the ant and “Go to the ant, O sluggard, observe her ways and be wise, which, having no chief, officer or ruler, prepares her food in the summer and gathers her provision in the harvest.”  There is a lot to be taught about the responsibilities involved with earning that penny.  The Bible serves as a wonderful tool to teach us what to do with what is earned, how not to be ruled by money and how to share our blessings.  So rather than limiting the lesson to just not falling in love with money, the Bible will become the first financial planner for her.

Marie

The Times are A-Changing

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.  The Serenity Prayer (–Reinhold Niebuhr)

So much is changing at once that I needed to start this post with the serenity prayer.  Most of what is changing in my life is in the long-term;  my mother is ready to (finally) leave NY and move closer to us…well, possibly in with us, which could lead to house hunting .  My daughter will be starting high school with a roster that will challenge our schedules; hubby is looking forward to a  promotion at work that will have him busier than usual and I am seriously considering taking a graduate course to help out with my writing.  All good changes but changes none-the -ess. 

In the international news, Haiti’s newly elected President was announced.  Michel Martelly has been named the 47^th president of the island nation.  I’ve been keeping a close eye on the elections hoping and praying that whoever was voted in would provide some hope for the troubled island.  Had I been able to participate in the election, my vote would have gone to the opposition.  She seemed more stable, grounded, educated and experienced.  He’s a musician, whose lyrics and antics in the past have not been favorable…but he led a strong campaign.  Haiti needs positive change so I’m going to continue to pray that this decision is for the best.

The weather is changing too.  We had the nastiest of winters here in the Northeast and by a few weekends ago it seemed that we had finally entered spring and the promise of somewhat warmer climates. Then on April 1^st it snowed. Big….Giant….Flakes.  It’s cold again, down to the 20s tonight.  Where the heck is spring?

I know this post is all over the place, I am not a creature of change but rather one of habit.  Whenever I met with too many changes at once, I hibernate. I started to feel like creeping into hibernation this morning after talking with my Mom and she confirmed that she’d like to move by years’ end.  I started thinking about all things that need to fall into place before she can come, and how things will change once she arrives, and I got that hibernation feeling.  Then I whispered the serenity prayer and in the midst of retelling myself that God will grant me courage to face all changes whether self-inflicted or not, I remembered….HE is the one thing that will not change.  “Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good. His love endures forever!” (Psalm 136:1, NIV) ENDURES that’s the word I needed to hear.  His love is constant, withstanding all changes, always present.  Bring on the change…I’ve got back-up!

Marie